I Believe That The "Children are Resilient" Argument is DANGEROUS

I believe that the "children are resilient" argument is DANGEROUS.

It gives those who are ignorant about mental health and neurodiversity the green light to continue subjecting children to that which is already traumatising them.

People who swear by "children are resilient", and repeat it as a mantra, are closed to understanding more about how traditional parenting, teaching and disciplinary styles yield completely different results depending on the individual to whom they are administered.

I understand the premise, and that some people would view this phrase as optimistic and encouraging. I myself believe children all have their own unique strengths and potential, but need TAILORED approaches given that they are all different.

Blanket statements and sweeping generalisations such as "children are resilient" assume children are all the same and require the same treatment, and that said treatment HAS to be good for them, however much it hurts.

This phrase causes more harm than good, in my view. Especially when employed by those who use it as some kind of justification for their harmful acts and thus excuse themselves from changing their mindset and approach.

It's also dangerous for the well-meaning parent, guardian or teacher who innocently adopt beliefs such as this, convinced it must be helpful as it's just one of those traditional heirlooms passed down from generation after generation.

Neurodivergent children are finding it hard enough to cope with the world as it is, and for their distress behaviours to then be mistaken for indiscipline, whilst labelled "resilient", is an insult and invalidation of the highest order.

To me, when fallen into the wrong hands, "children are resilient" is synonymous with a lack of accountability.

The phrase assumes that the treatment on the part of the adult is justified and MUST be beneficial to the child, and that the child is at fault and their pain just a normal part of the treatment process...

Never assume how much someone can take, especially before you've endured the same yourself.